If I keep an eye glued to the clock, I can see time pass but who has time to watch the clock? Not me. I’m too busy being retired. Yep, I am retired and have been since last summer. But ask me where those 10 months have gone, what I did during that period, what I accomplished, etc. and I’m clueless.
Let’s figure this out.
I still spend mornings on the MAC checking out what’s happening in the world. Then there’s lunch and sometimes a nap. So maybe I’ve just been wasting a lot of time.
Wait just a sec. I’ve read books. A lot of books.
Oddly, my stack of to-be-read books is piled just as high as it was a year ago. Maybe higher. That must be where all my time went. I’ve been buying books online. You’re welcome, Amazon.com.
Could be worse. I could have spent all that time cleaning house.
Ever wonder about what might have been? I don’t very often but in the last few weeks have indulged in a romanticized trip down memory lane.
A friend from college recently mentioned via Facebook that a mutual friend from back then wasn’t doing very well. You see, the mutual friend was tucked way back in a cubbyhole in my brain as “the one that got away.” It’s a really long story and I won’t torture you with the details except to say that I always thought it was my own fault. I’ve carried around regret for years and, from time to time, wondered what might have been—until my friend and I took our conversation offline (yes, people do still have conversations outside of Facebook) and I learned more.
You see, I’ve always believed in fate, that things happen for a reason. Maybe not the things I want, much less the reason I want them, or when for that matter, but there is always a reason. As a result, I’ve pretty much strolled through life going with gut instinct. I learned early on that over-thinking big decisions leads me down the wrong path. Doesn’t matter what the decision is about. Whether it’s to pick up and move across the country or what color car to buy, if I over think it, it does not work out well for me. (I still, to this day, can’t fathom why I bought that gray car. I hated it. I hate gray. Yet, it seemed like such a good idea at the time.)
Hearing more about our friend, and how he’s conducted his life, brought an end to my little excursion down memory lane. You see, it turns out that if the “one that got away” hadn’t, I would have gotten what I wanted at the time, but would have regretted it year after year after year. That regretful reality would have been so much worse that my regretful “what might have been” illusion.
Which leads me to reprieve.
From where I sit now, it looks like that fateful day, regretful though it was at the time, was my reprieve from a lifetime of disillusion.
This happy camper’s big decision today is whether to go with dusting first or running the vacuum. H-m-m-m, my gut says read my new book.
I could say I’ve been really busy as the reason for why it’s been a while since my last post but the reality is that I’ve just not had a lot to say. I get focused in other directions and forget that I even have a blog. There’s my guilt confession. I forgot about you blog. Oops!
A lot has happened in the last three months. I’m now, officially, a year older.
Read some good books by some of my favorite authors – Suzanne Kearsley, Harriet Evans, Beth Hoffman, Dorothea Benton Frank, and Mary Kay Andrews.
Movies this summer have been a disappointment, though. I guess the highlight for me was the new Star Trek pic, but not much else has given me a reason to spend a small fortune to sit in big dark room with too many other people just to be entertained. Even the thought of popcorn couldn’t entice me to see most of what’s in the theaters this summer.
I’ve mentioned my house mates, Ollie and Emmy, in a few other blogs. You may remember that they’ve been with me since 2001. Though Emmy is doing fine, Ollie had cancer and, rather than prolong his suffering, I had him put down in June.
We miss him. Well, maybe Emmy doesn’t. He was pretty much a bully and made her life miserable. I think she is actually pretty happy now. She has the run of the house and has become quite playful again.
I’ll try to not forget about you again blog. With a little luck, I’ll be able to squeeze a few posts in between studying for the next CCP module exam and whatever else I can find to do to avoid studying.